In this episode, Cat shares the distinction between productive business actions and avoidance tactics — when you are doing work to avoid the work needed to grow your business. We talk through how to know what to work on in your business and what not to work on.
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Hello, hello, hello. Welcome back to Show Up Real Podcast. I hope you are having a good start to your week. Y’all, how are you? I feel like I have been so back and forth with when I’ve been posting these episodes. Look, here’s the deal. Back, I forget what month it was, but I let go of my podcast manager at least six months ago now.
And ever since then, my podcast episodes have come out on crazy times and different days. And we try to stick to Wednesday or Thursday, but it’s been a little, it’s been a little messy. Like I’m clear and I want to like, I’ve, I think I talked about this a little bit before, but I, I’m going to hire one back because this is a problem. And it’s because I’m managing it all right now for the most part. I do have my team who.
has supported me with some of the editing, but for the most part, I have been doing the publishing on my own. I don’t know why actually, I should have had my team do it, regardless, I am bringing on a podcast manager again, which I’m very, very excited about, but I just wanted to call that out because this has been a little sloppy, which actually,
actually has a lot to do with today’s episode because today’s episode we are going to talk about the difference between the action that is going to move your business forward and the actions that are you avoiding the work you need to do. I am so pumped for this episode because there is a distinct difference and I think it’s important
that we know that difference because you could spend all day working on work that is not gonna move the needle in your business, a hundred freaking percent. So today’s episode, I hope to clear up what is the work that you need to do in your business and stay committed to your Q4 lock-in.
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whatever those goals were that you chose on episode, I think it was a couple episodes ago, whatever those goals were, this is gonna help you stay focused on doing the right things and knowing and having the self-awareness to know when you’re not taking action that’s gonna move the needle, you’re avoiding the work. So that is what today’s episode is all about. And it’s relevant because I have been like,
I go through so many phases in my business where I go back and forth with this and I feel like I’ve been in that phase. So that’s what we’re talking about today. Besides that, I did want to update you on a couple of things. I have a training that I’m doing very, very soon and I’m so excited about it. So let’s get into it. Let me just, why am I nervous? I’m a little bit nervous telling you this. I think it’s because I really do, like I’m really pumped about this one.
And I’m a little nervous because I hope it is taken well. So let’s talk about it. So before we get started with today’s episode, I want to personally invite you to a free three hour training that I am calling Middle Finger Marketing. It’s happening December 3rd from 9 a.m. to 12 p.m. Pacific Standard Time. So this training is for entrepreneurs, coaches, creatives, creators.
who are ready to stop overthinking their marketing, simplify how they sell and show up with real conviction. We’re going to talk about strategy, sales strategy specifically, self-trust as a strategy and then how to market in a way that feels like you while still converting. This three hour training is really about putting up a middle finger to
all of the thoughts we have or the side of ourselves that believes that we have to perform perfectly and act a certain way and be this way or that way to be worthy of visibility or money or goodness or love. This training really came from me thinking about what energy
Catalina Del Carmen (06:12.791)
did I have to have to be very unapologetic in taking action in my business, taking action in my marketing, taking action in sales. And when I was thinking about what kind of training I wanted to create and what I wanted to teach towards the end of the year, it was really this, well, it came from a concept that I taught my mastermind clients at least a year, maybe a year and a half ago.
And the concept is called middle finger energy. It’s a whole training inside of my portal. And this concept came from really teaching my clients the way they have to think if they wanna grow their coaching business, if they wanna grow their service-based business, okay? And when I taught this, it really came from me thinking deeply about my experience in terms of marketing.
and what kind of energy I had to adopt. And one person that deeply inspired this concept was Cardi B. When I started thinking about like the energy that you have to have to be more visible, to market more, to sell more, to be wildly committed to your business, when I think about that energy, I think about someone like Cardi B. She is so herself.
She is unapologetic about it. She is so true to who she is. She is unashamed. She is, she seems very unbothered. Although I did just watch something by her and she was saying how like certain things really do bug her. But there’s this energy that you have to have to let go of all of our trauma and thoughts and conditioning.
that keeps us playing it so freaking safe. So this training is really about you making a decision that you no longer are going to perform and try to be perfect and try to make everything right before actually going out there and making yourself visible, selling the F out of your coaching. My goal for you is that you leave this training
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fully committed to your mission, like what you want your business to look like, unashamed about selling the fuck out of your programs, unbothered when there is a family member who says something or a customer who an old client or whatever, just like really unbothered, becoming a person who’s like, you know what, it’s okay if people have thoughts about me. And then lastly,
becoming detached and just allowing your marketing to be something that doesn’t have to represent you or your worthiness. That’s like really what this training is about. I’m going to be teaching a couple things. I’m going to be teaching sales, okay? I’m gonna teach you how to sell your offer and get fully booked. Number two, I’m gonna teach you how to
create content from your own expertise. And then lastly, we’re gonna talk about embodying this energy and how to do that. So I’m really pumped. This training is not only is, it’s kind of a work in progress, because the more I’m talking about it, the more I’m diving into it, the more I realize like the directions I wanna take this. But overall, I’m gonna be teaching you sales and marketing.
and the energetic and mindset of getting fully booked and really committing to your business, especially going into 2026. So it’s completely free. It’s three hours long. It is a commitment of your time. And I recommend taking the time to be there. If your goal is to get fully booked and really grow your business next year, I highly recommend you being there.
You could find the link below in the show notes or you can head to my Instagram @catdelcarmen and go to my link in bio and you’ll see it in there. But I’m so, so pumped. Come, it’s gonna be so good. All right, now let’s talk about today’s episode, okay? Let’s talk about today’s episode. First, I wanna talk about what doing the work really means, okay? I wanna talk about what the action.
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that you take in your business as you go after your goals, want to talk about what that means. So number one, I want to make it clear that if you create a plan, right, if you create any sort of plan, even if it’s very high level, even if it’s very general, but if you made the decision considering, you know, your business, your time, your clients, like if you made a
plan, then that means you made an intentional decision. I think a lot of us are really easy to tell ourselves like, I’m just being lazy or I don’t want to just record this piece of content because I had this idea, I should think it through. And we could put a lot of barriers between us and the action, right? Or I should say the execution of what we desire.
Although, of course, I want you to have intention behind your actions, I think we can overanalyze what the planning of that looks like. Because at the end of the day, if you created a plan and then you’re taking action on it, that means it was intentional.
It means it was intentional. And the way I want you to think about the execution, like when you’re actually implementing the plan, that is where I want you to give yourself a lot of room to be imperfect, to have flexibility, to go fast, okay? So number one is like have the plan and make your intention known, not known to everyone, just known to you, right?
Like write it down and have your intention, but let the execution be flexible. Let the implementation be imperfect. Let it be a little messy. That’s the part you want to be a little messy. Because typically, unless you’ve done it over and over and over before, but you’re probably gonna be doing something new. And if you’re going to be doing something new, then you have to allow flexibility in the execution piece.
Catalina Del Carmen (13:17.579)
Okay, so the core idea here is really once the plan is made, the doing will likely not feel perfect. Okay, the doing will likely not feel perfect. So let’s get into this a little bit more, because I wanna talk about what avoidance action is. So I’m separating this in two pieces. One is plan.
planned actions and avoidant actions, okay, or avoidance actions. So planned actions, this is the stuff that moves the needle in your business. And I say moves the needle a lot. And when I say that, I really mean moves the growth towards the goal you made. Typically that is sales, new clients, bigger following.
depends on your goal, right? But your planned action is the stuff that moves the needle closer to your goal.
That’s the simplest way to say it. That’s how you know that the work is planned. But let me give you examples. So sticking to the plan that you set, the first way I want you to think about this is I want you to focus on when you’re taking, so once the plan is set, I want you to focus on allowing yourself to create a first version of something, okay? Because typically when we are taking action,
we’re gonna wanna micromanage it. Our brain is gonna wanna micromanage it. So I really want you to get used to the fact that you really just need like a minimal, minimum viable version, okay? Minimal viable version. And what that means is like, what is the first version of whatever you are doing that has just what it needs?
Catalina Del Carmen (15:25.886)
to make it valuable, right? So for example, this could be you creating a webinar, right? Now, when you have a webinar course and if you go through it all, I’ll tell you everything you’re supposed to have, right? Because I’ve done lots and lots of webinars. So I’ll be like, you need a graphic, you need this, you need that, you need this page and an opt-in page, and you say this, and here’s the email, and then you send multiple emails to remind people, and da, da, da, da, right? Like that’s…
plan, right? Like that’s the way you’re supposed to do it, but that’s not the way you’re supposed to do it the first fricking time, unless you are like wildly, you know, good at taking, you’re incredibly productive. But if it’s your first time doing it, or even if it’s your second, whatever, like you gotta give yourself room to just get what you need to get out now. So let me give you an example of what that looks like, because it still could be messy, right?
So I’m launching this free training that’s happening in December. And this free training, I probably should have started marketing this like two weeks ago. So I’m already behind. And by the way, I wanna be clear is like when I’m telling myself I’m two weeks behind, it’s based off of how I typically do this, how I typically have launches. But I know that coming in, right?
So I’m like, okay, we know this already, so it’s just gonna be a little late. Okay, fine. I started announcing it before the graphics were ready for this. Again, that is something that I typically don’t, like ideally the graphics and everything would be done ahead of time. But it’s not, and we gotta keep things moving. So I’m going to start teasing it in my marketing any way I can.
Okay, I’m not gonna get mad at myself. I’m not gonna tell myself I’m being so messy or I’m being so irresponsible. No, I’m being a fucking business owner. Keep things moving. When I worked in tech, I worked at a company called Tube Mogul and they, the CEOs, or the co-founders I should say, they sold the company to Adobe. I forget for how much, but it was a lot of money. And…
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They had a really great culture and they had certain values and like these quotes that they put on the training modules and like all over. And I actually worked in learning and development and training. And they had these values and one of the values was, God, now I’m forgetting it. But one of the, like they had, I’m just gonna name the ones I remember, but some of the values sounded like this.
It’s better to make a mistake than ask for permission. Like they were fine with you making mistakes, but we don’t want you to ask permission. You know why? Because permission takes mother effing time. We don’t have time to ask for permission. We gotta get things moving. So the culture of that company was, I rather you make a mistake than ask for permission.
Because then at least you’re keeping things moving. That’s the culture we wanna create here. So they had multiple of these, but that was one of them. And I loved it because I was like, we’re safe to make mistakes. And this is what I mean in terms of the thinking behind taking action. Action gets to be messy if the intention has already been set.
This is a part of the plan, then let it be fucking messy. Excuse my language, but let it be messy. Okay, so you have to tease your webinar because your graphics aren’t done, so be it. Then we’ll do that. It’s about making quick decisions and keeping things moving and not micro analyzing or micro managing yourself and your own projects.
Because typically when we’re micromanaging our own projects, it’s typically not us trying to do it well. It’s typically because the part of our brain that wants to keep us safe feels safer when you’re not taking the action at all. It feels safer to procrastinate. It feels safer to not go all in, to not let things be messy.
Catalina Del Carmen (20:17.565)
that feels safer than doing it at all. So when you are in implementation, when you’re taking action, when you’re executing, I want you to give yourself full permission to let things be messy. Let yourself make decisions on the fly. Problem solve every single fricking day. Like if you have a problem, you solve it. You just solve it right then and there.
this graphic has a typo in it. Okay, well, shit. All right, I’m gonna post it on my stories and then I’m gonna add text and I’m gonna cover the part that has the typo and I’m gonna rewrite it with the text from stories and it’s gonna stand out and it’s gonna look weird but then I’m gonna screenshot it then I’m gonna add it in the carousel. Cause I don’t give a fuck, we gotta keep things moving. That’s what I mean. That’s what I mean. Right? And now, no, sometimes you just get to edit the typo and whatever, right? But.
the energy behind like, let’s just keep this moving. That is not messy. I don’t want you to tell yourself that that is bad. I don’t want you to tell yourself that problem solving on the fly is messy or you shouldn’t do that. You should have planned better. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That is planned action. You did plan and this is a part of the process.
Okay, when you capture the idea, right? When you capture the idea, like especially when you’re, sorry, I’m thinking of like when you’re in the motion and you’re executing and then you have an idea for something fresh and new that’s completely related to what you’re planning. I don’t want you to stop yourself and be like, no, no, no, this is like too much depending on how big it is, right? Obviously you only consider the how much.
and work it’ll take, but you could ask yourself, okay, I have this idea. I wanna do an Instagram live series three times during the week of the webinar. So, shit, should I do that? Okay, like, let’s go. Like, how can we make that work? How can we make this easy and simple and still get the value across? That is all planned action. That is intentional AF, okay? So I never want you to…
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be like, give yourself a hard time about being a real true entrepreneur who’s problem solving and fixing things as you go. Do not call it bad or messy or you shoulda, coulda, woulda. Like there’s no time for that. You gotta keep moving and implementing what you said you would implement. So that is planned action, okay? That is planned action. Now avoidant action or avoidance action.
I don’t know what’s the right way to say that. To me, avoidant action sounds great, but I think it might be avoidance action. I’ll look at this stuff later. But I’m going to call it avoidant. Avoidant action. This is the stuff that feels productive, but it’s not moving the needle. Typically, avoidance action is stuff that makes you feel good because you’re productive.
Typically, it’s stuff that kind of fuels the ego a little, right? Like this is why people work on their websites for like three months before telling anyone that they have a business. To me, that’s crazy. Like the first thing you should do is go get a client. No website, no nothing. Like just see what you can do with your mouth and your expertise. Mouth, that sounds, okay, yeah. Just like go talk to people.
avoidance action is the stuff that feels productive. this is, here’s what this looks like.
reworking things that are already good enough. So for example, this is something I’m so guilty of. get still this day, I try not to, but I get so stuck on webinar title names. I get so stuck on them. I could just think about it for like weeks, but I don’t have weeks. And I have done it for weeks and I’ve procrastinated and it was not helpful.
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I would rather, and I was just telling my client the other day on a coaching call, I would rather you put out a webinar with a title, and I’ve done this. Like I’ve put out a webinar, told everyone to come, and then like a couple weeks later I was like, you know what, I don’t really like that name. I like this name instead. Reworked the graphic and then reposted it again and said, everyone come, this is the webinar. It wasn’t a new webinar, it was the same webinar.
So the people who had already signed up had already seen it. Like it was all out there. And I think I even mentioned, I was like, I didn’t like the title, so I’m changing it, right? That’s what I mean by like that, like sure, it didn’t need to change the name, but if it’s really bugging me, then fuck it, let me just change the name and let’s keep things moving. It doesn’t mean I created a whole brand new graphic and like whatever, I just like edit it. And I was like, perfect, I’ll just use this as like, I’m.
even more extra promo.
But if I were to pause everything and create a whole new graphic and create a whole new opt-in page, right? And created a whole new, like if I decided to redo everything mid promotion of this webinar, then that would be avoidant action. That would be me taking a lot of time to do things that aren’t pushing the needle. Because I already did that work.
doing double the work. Preparing and planning, like your planning shouldn’t take that long. You could be preparing forever. If you find yourself preparing for one piece of content for like weeks, that is a problem. You need to not prepare as much. Preparing is one of the most popular ways to avoid the work you need to do.
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It could be cleaning, could be organizing. I remember, like I’ve had so many clients and one specifically lately who’s like, I’m doing a lot of backend work. I’m like, you don’t, your business is like bringing in like a couple thousand a month. What kind of backend work are you working on? Because as a person who’s made a lot of money, right, sold hundreds of thousands.
I can’t imagine anything that’s more important, that’s in the back end of your business, that’s more important than selling and marketing. Obviously it depends on your business model. I don’t know, you know, this doesn’t speak for everyone, but for most people…
Preparing and planning shouldn’t take weeks at a time.
Catalina Del Carmen (27:46.258)
You don’t wanna be staying preparing. And I do this too sometimes, like I’ll over plan and they’ll be like, I can’t not look at this, I just need to take action.
Catalina Del Carmen (27:57.124)
starting new ideas midweek, changing your ideas all the time, and then stopping the new ideas you’ve had. my God, can I tell you, like, I have had to, like, challenge myself when it comes to this, specifically with Signature Series. Like, I would put out a Signature Series and then I’d be like, fuck it, I don’t like it. My brain is just like, nope, it’s not good. I still struggle with this.
But here’s what I want you to know is I want you to start being aware of it. that’s step one of this is be aware of the work you’re avoiding. Be aware of your avoidance work, your avoidance action. Busy work, cleaning, organizing, fixing, off-plan tasks. The other recently…
I forget what I was supposed to do, instead of what I was supposed to do, I created a brand new freebie. I created a opt-in page, a many chats link.
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I took like the whole first half of my day and I didn’t do the work I was supposed to do.
all morning. And then after I was done with that, I was like, what the F? Okay, let’s get back to what we are supposed to do. We’re also not gonna get mad at ourselves, but that is avoidance actions, okay? So planned actions, intentional action is recording the idea that you have immediately, publishing the imperfect post.
following your weekly content plan, even if it’s not up to the standard that you want yet. Finishing today’s tasks before upgrading it. Before upgrading it. Avoidance tasks or avoidance action. Switching platforms mid-idea, recording on TikTok, and then being like, nevermind, I’m putting this on Instagram. Let me start over. Editing a reel for two to four hours, I know that’s crazy. I actually have edited, I think there’s times where you wanna edit and you wanna learn how to edit, but like would plan for that.
Redesigning graphics. God knows that I have done that many times, but like I could spend hours on Canva. Research spirals, just researching and researching, being on ChatGP freaking T, editing a sales page for hours on end.
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Let me rewrite this one more time.
That is avoidance action. When you’re, it’s a cycle.
And here’s what your brain will say. Like when you are, like when you, this is what I want you to be cognizant of. Like when your brain’s getting into that avoidant action, I want you to hear your own thoughts. And if it sounds something like, this needs more time, you should plan better, or you should plan more, you should have planned for this. Let’s make it better. This, should, I should definitely like, I need to be making these edits so much better.
You’re not ready for this yet. That is what your brain is going to want to tell you, those types of things, when you are taking avoidant action. Because the reality is your brain wants safety. It doesn’t want momentum. So intentional action, planned action, that creates momentum. And momentum is scary for your brain. Because we don’t know what’s on the other side of momentum.
We want the sales, we want the clients, we want the good stuff, but the reality is our brain isn’t used to it until we get there. And if our brain isn’t used to it and it’s unfamiliar territory, then it doesn’t wanna go there. As much as your heart desires it, your brain is gonna be like, uh-uh, let’s just stay right here and let’s just plan this for 10 more days because it’s comfortable.
Catalina Del Carmen (32:27.493)
So here’s how you stay in planned action. One, you focus on creating the minimum viable version of whatever you’re doing. Ask yourself, does this move the needle today? Is this a part of the plan or is this an escape? Stick to the task even when the urge to upgrade
kicks in.
Finish the reps. You can optimize later. You can optimize later.
That’s what I want you to remember. And of course, there’s so much nuance to this. Sometimes you’re gonna spend a little too much time editing. Cool, fine, it’s not a big deal. But what I really want you to take away from this is the bigger projects. If you’re working on, I’m thinking of one client who’s just like, she’s working on something that I know is not gonna create the goal that she wants for herself.
I’ve told her this, she knows this. Now she’s still working on it. And if she wants to work on it, I’m gonna support her. But she knows that it’s not gonna move the needle. I know it’s avoidant work. She knows it’s avoidant work, but she wants to do it, right? But what I want for you is like, what result do you actually want? Do you want clients? Do you want more followers? Do you want more, like what is it?
Catalina Del Carmen (34:10.434)
Identify that and then once you have that, make the plan and then take intentional action. Give yourself space to be flexible, flexible with how, with the execution. So here are some reminders for you for those participating in the lock-in, Q4 lock-in. And even if you’re just listening to this one, you’re like, I wanna participate, go a couple episodes back, you’ll see it.
It’s a series, so you’ll see a couple. But if you are participating or if you’re just going after a goal, here’s what I want to remind you. Flexibility over perfection. Be flexible. Okay? Be flexible with the execution. Number two, momentum is greater than polished. Instead of making it look polished, create the momentum. Keep things moving.
Version 1 is required for version 2.
All right, iPhone, we’re on, what are we on? iPhone 17 or something? I’m sure that iPhone 17 was something in their brain when they were like iPhone 10. But if they just focus on iPhone 17, they wouldn’t have all the data from customers from iPhone 11 and 12 and 13 and 14 and 15 and 16.
Catalina Del Carmen (35:41.584)
Version one is required for version two. Finished what you said you’d finish. This is me doing this today. I really did not want to record this podcast.
But I’m like, no, no bitch. You said you would.
Catalina Del Carmen (36:01.51)
Planned action builds trust with yourself. Avoidance action just burns time. Just burns time. Pick the one that gets you where you want to go. I hope this was helpful. And for those of you who are like, I’m in it, I’m moving, I’m ready, this is the energy, I wanna invite you to work with me.
I’m opening up one-on-one, not opening up, I have one-on-ones open right now, one-on-one spots for one-on-one coaching. And for those of you who want a partner to plan for next year to start moving and creating momentum, create a marketing plan that feels like you create your next goal, having a partner problem solving, having a mindset.
coach right with you, work with me. I want to help you to get to where you want to go. All right. And for those of you who have not yet, make sure you sign up for Middle Finger Marketing. I’m so excited about it. All right, y’all, I will see you later. I send you a big hug. Bye.
Hey Amiga, if you are not on my email list, you are missing out on some juicy content. I share sales and marketing tips every single week. Plus, you’re the first to know about new freebies and webinars and all the other things fun happening. To get on the list, sign up for my free training, How to Sell Out Four Figure Offers.
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